Search Terms, Part II

You have to wonder about some people and the things that go on over the internet.  Here is a round-up of some of the stranger search terms used to find this blog:

pachyderm seinfeld

Well, Elaine did go to Tufts; perhaps our intrepid googler was looking for her alma mater’s mascot?  Alternatively, was there an episode with a cameo appearance of zoo animals?

spontaneous abortions atheism

Only Jews carry to term all the time.  Agnostics aren’t certain whether or not there is a baby to carry to term.

men can’t get aroused

What alternate reality have we here? Try these lines: “Hello.”  “Good morning.”  “I broke my leg, am haemorrhaging to death, and need an ambulance.”  Any one is considered an open invitation to intercourse.

scarf hold sex

Um… perhaps TotalTransformation can help y’all out with that one.

classics porn star

Err… the elephant left college quite some time ago, but cannot seem to remember anything along those lines from her days as a classical studies major. 

mechanical deer

Do you mean to say that those super-cute deer that hang out in the law school parking lot at 3 am, that make leaving the library at such an absurd hour endurable, are mechanical?  Talk about sucking all the joy out of life.

nerdy women

Finally, someone came to the right place.

chocolate tree

Where is this wondrous creation, and can they grow in apartments?  Is it good chocolate (say, San Fran based chocolate trees) or that Hershey’s stuff?