Posted by: bridget | 2 February 2008

Search Terms

Since it’s been a few months since the last installment of “Strange Search Terms that Internet Whackadoodles Have Used to Find This Blog,” here’s a list for Groundhog Day:

what drug would be used to stop a taxi driver

Because “Stop right now, or I won’t tip you 20%” doesn’t work?  Would you inject whatever drug this is into the jugular while the poor soul is driving? 

what does red and blue make in art

Purple.  This is art.  If it were politics, it would be John McCain.

arguments against prochoice tumor

Generally, you zap the things with radiation or take them out with chemo, instead of reasoning with the mass of unwanted cells, pro-choice or not.

solutions to understaffing in restaurant

Hire more people or seat the customers at regular intervals. 

Bambi and Thumper sex

Both are males.  For more on the subject, read this.  Or check out this other term: “For environmental balance pick up a rifle”

liberals run HUD

No kidding. 

do guys enjoy kissing and do guys care about how girls kiss

No to the first; the male audience can give opinions on the second.  Update: just got this one:

kissing women+men in the bath

Get dirty while you get clean?  Now, is someone actually so clueless that he needed to google that? 

sharpie court cases

Damn markers are horribly litigious. 

madison ct police prostitution fantasies

For those who missed the memo: Madison’s finest actually lived out the fantasies, hence the scandal.

nerdy women sex

Similar search terms: “Where can I buy a unicorn?”, “Tooth Fairy sightings”, and “The Easter Bunny said to say hi.”

government harming box turtles

Sunday School Teacher, you are responsible for this one.  For those who missed the memo: the government actually mandates that you stop and help a box turtle to cross the road, and, once you’ve moved him to the other side, point him the direction he was previously traveling in.

eco friendly suicide

Tully can explain all of that.  He’ll even buy the materials and take them to the recycling facility afterwards.

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Responses

  1. “do guys enjoy kissing”

    We sure do!

    And btw I got my worst search term ever a few weeks ago…ready?

    IT was (I’ll put in some * so you don’t get traffic from it)…

    “k*ds ahving s*x”

    (The asterisks were added by me, the misspelling was his). EWWWW!!!

  2. TT – most of my exes don’t, really. Or only as a means to an end, not as anything valuable for itself.

    Okay, in my world, that search term was put into google by one of the chastity crowd who is doing research on the harmful effects of the sexual revolution.

    Thanks for putting those asterisks in. I’ll email you the search term I keep getting, that I did NOT want to put in there for fear of getting more hits from it.

  3. Why is it that everybody else gets the creepy search terms? Should I find a different pack of bloggers to run with?

    *ponders the kissing remarks* I wouldn’t know…

  4. Um… I blame some of those search terms on my commenters – like TT, Sunday School Teacher, and PatHMV.

    Don’t find other bloggers! We would miss you!

    As for the kissing remarks – yeah, when I was your age, I didn’t, either.

  5. I would rather be responsilbe for the box turtle thing than the Bambi and Thumper sex one.

    That is just weird, however, at the risk of being banned I suppose that would come under inter-species same sex relationships? I wonder if that is legal in Vermont?

  6. Yes, and in Texas, post-Lawrence.

  7. Well, at the heart of thumper’s liberty is the right to define one’s own concept of existence, of meaning, of the universe, and of the mystery of rabbit life, after all. Although that’s still downright disturbing.

  8. ROFL.

    Good one. I may borrow that sometime. :)

  9. If Thumper is living an alternate life-style, and a fox eats him; Is that a hate crime or just lunch?

  10. Good question. Readers?

  11. Lunch. totally.

  12. […] week is a toss-up between Simon and Sunday School Teacher, on Search Terms: SST: That is just weird, however, at the risk of being banned I suppose that would come under […]


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